Saturday, January 31, 2009

Today, the hospital made Paige feel as if she were back at school by giving her a half day of Saturday classes.  While she was in physical therapy, her father ran out to Petco to buy collars and tags for the menagerie of monkeys, bears, tigers and dogs sent by you, her very generous friends, so that Paige will know them all when her memory returns.  The cashier looked perplexed at this customer buying a large fistful of collars in a variety of colors and textures in eight, ten and twelve inch lengths.

This afternoon, our good friend, and Nina's mother, Laurie gave Paige a manicure and a foot massage.  Paige told her that this was the first time her feet had not hurt since she has been in the hospital.  Laurie also brought a large bright orange scarf for Paige's mother, because Paige had commented earlier that her mother always dressed in boring shades of grey.

Paige's uncles from Colorado and Pennsylvania, Amory and Chris, and her "twin" cousin Alex then arrived together for a first visit.  We briefed them beforehand in the cafeteria on the hospital's guidelines for relating to a person with a brain injury: remember that the person is thinking in slow motion, speak slowly of familiar people, places and experiences, use simple sentences, limit the visitors in the room, and always be calm, patient and positive.

When we brought them up to see Paige, she surprised us all by greeting each of them with a bright, big smile.  She would summon them one by one, in rotation, into her room until she tired of that formality and came out to the waiting room to greet them all.  She was far more lucid than even the day before.

The other Alex, her great friend from Kent, then arrived bearing news from school, brightly colored gel stickers for her window, and a large folder filled with greeting cards.  On the hospital's advice we had limited Paige to one visitor from school this weekend, but Paige was ready for more.

You were ready for her too.  Dear Hannah wrote that she had worked out on Mapquest that she could make it from Kent to Paige, on foot, in seven and one half hours.

We were able to recount to Paige some of the events of the last two weeks, and particularly the overwhelming outpouring of support in cards, flowers, blog comments and visits that she could not remember.  She absorbed every detail, at times quizzically, and often with a smile.   

We have found peace in the knowledge of your prayers and love and support, the guidance of her great medical teams, a few well learned prayers and a simple faith.  Today gave that peace an even stronger foundation.  It is a day that we will treasure.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Food, glorious solid food.  While Paige was in physical therapy, Laurie slipped down to the visitors' cafeteria and brought a buffet of Paige's favorite foods to her room.

Paige ate her way through most of the choices until she said she was full.  Laurie then unveiled the slab of chocolate cake that had been in hiding.  Paige thought she might have a little more room.  They both smiled.

Paige worked hard at two sessions of physical therapy, two sessions of occupational therapy and a session of speech therapy.  This will be her core routine, interspersed with medical visits and psychological assessments, now that her strength is returning and she is sleeping more at night.

For her memory test, she was able to recite the months of the year in reverse order (a feat that gives her parents and grandparents pause), recall countries that she has visited, and write a sentence.  These are all improvements from yesterday.

Paige's mind is surprisingly connected to the outside world.  I mentioned that we need a good Secretary of State and asked if she remembered the President's choice.  She came right out with "Hillary Clinton".  Earlier, Laurie read to her from the Times about the President calling the Wall Street bonuses shameful.  Laurie then started to put them in the context of all the bailouts, including the rescue of the auto industry.  Paige exclaimed, "O God, I forgot about that one!"

This evening we watched "Hairspray" until Paige fell asleep.  When Tracy belted out "Good morning Baltimore, every day's like an open door, every night is a fantasy, every sound's like a symphony", Paige muttered,  "My friends wish they could sing that about Greenwich...".

At this moment she is sleeping peacefully.  Thank you all for holding her up in your thoughts and prayers.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

What a simple joy to see Paige sipping from her ubiquitous water bottle and eating her first solid foods today.  Laurie is now allowed to cook for Paige, which is good for both of them, and she arrived this morning with macaroni and cheese, swedish meatballs and brown rice to celebrate a fond farewell to the dreadful dysphagia diet.  Paige told the dietician that her favorite food was really...chocolate.

Paige approached her physical therapy with determination.  She climbed stairs and tied her sneakers.  She told her nurse that her Mom overreacts and over analyses, then peppered Laurie with many an "I love you".  

We are all finding our way around her impressive rehabilitation hospital.  Paige is followed by the medical director of the brain injury program, the director of rehabilitation psychology, a director of neurological rehabilitation, a case worker, a neurosurgeon, and many wonderful therapists and nurses.  Her team, and they are quite a team, thinks she is making good progress.  

We received perhaps the largest get well card ever to pass through the postal service.  It is signed by most of the Kent community.  It is petitioning Paige to recover.  Many thanks for pulling that together.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Today was therapeutic, or at least filled with therapy.  Paige had two sessions of physical therapy, one of occupational therapy, and one with speech pathology, met the recreational therapist, and took memory tests with the doctor.  She was cleared for swallowing regular liquids and can say goodbye to those juices that were thickened to nectar consistency.

Paige could retrieve some old information and some new.  She said Liz is known as a rower, Brooks as a boater and she as a swimmer, and she counted a long dead beagle as one of the dogs waiting at home.  She said that she likes being kissed by her mom out of the blue.  And when her doctor asked her about the framed invitation to the inauguration that sits by her bed, she proudly told him that she is the president of the Kent Young Democrats.

Paige has a lot of work ahead of her.  We must repeat the blog health warning at the end of the rosy reports: the sparkly, spunky Paige is not back yet, and may not be for weeks or even months.  The physical therapy will bring back the strength lost to injuries and being bedridden. The occupational therapy will work on basic skills such as dressing, counting, and writing.  We still have to learn about recreational therapy, but it sounds great.  The brain needs to do its healing.

We are aware of many waiting visitors out there, and are grateful for your collective enthusiasm.  Her team here at Burke is helping formulate visiting guidelines that fit with her recovery.  We hope that limited visits can begin soon.

Thank you again for the mail and comments that poured in today.  You are all a blessing to Paige.  

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Tonight Paige left Stamford Hospital and a cast of medical luminaries.  She will not remember them, but they have asked repeatedly that Paige return to see them for a victory lap when she is well.

As we followed the ambulance from Stamford to her acute rehabilitation facility in White Plains, New York, we reflected on the talented team that Paige would have adored: the petite, confident and caring head trauma surgeon in charge of Paige's case who greeted us grimly on that awful early Sunday morning and dismissed us today with a smile as wide as the Hudson River; the compassionate ICU attending physician from South Africa who stopped in twice on Paige this morning as he made his rounds; the beautiful Indian doctor in her bright blue scrubs who would appear in the very middle of the night to look in on Paige; the dashing young neurosurgeon who kept Liz alert all night so that she could give him a thorough report on Paige when he made his rounds at dawn; and the endless and varied cast of nurses, technicians and aides of every nationality who gave their days and nights to Paige's recovery.  Thanks to their collective good efforts, she is on the way to a triumphant return.  

Paige now begins a comprehensive rehabilitation full of medical attention and extensive daily physical and occupational therapy.  She will be working hard and has much to learn, beginning with her swallowing, but she is supported by a talented team.

Ryan kindly returned to help us with night duty.  Paige's smile when she saw him moved us deeply.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Paige's physical progress is terrific.  Today, she was cleared to swallow fluids, although they are thickened to the consistency of pea soup.  She got in a short walk, and she ate a good lunch and dinner.

By the end of the day, Paige's central port, which mounts on her left shoulder and taps into her subclavian vein near the heart, had been removed.  The port is a supercharged IV with multiple tubes through which she was given liquids and most of her medicines.  The description of the blood that would be shed if she managed to get her fast little fingers on it and rip it out kept us all way on edge.

Tonight Paige was agitated, so she selected a few songs from a peaceful playlist that Ryan had assembled on her iPod.  She then stood and was held up in a sort of dance until her legs gave out.  Tonight she will sleep without restraints, but she will be watched vigilantly.

The reports on her physical progress, together with her cheery photo and all of our shared memories, make it easy to think that the old happy Paige is making these great physical strides.  Unfortunately, the traumatic brain injury is still very much with her, and Paige is struggling with the fear, pain and confusion that it brings.  All indications are positive for her full recovery, but she needs time to get that happy face and spirit back with us.  

Your support is bringing it back day by day.
A peaceful night must deserve to be followed by a restive one.  Last night Paige slept ninety minutes and became increasingly impatient with her restraints.  She worried about her swimming and talked about the 100 free, missing her meet, and Westminster.  Yet, after a catnap this morning, she ate well, walked 260 feet, and is now sitting in a chair.

Today we are hoping for more physical therapy and some good eating.  We are now allowed to bring in foods for the dysphagia diet: bland purees of medium consistency.  Yum.  Paige made her father test them all last night, apparently expecting that we might be adding poisoning to the many tortures of her imprisonment.

At home our water pipes burst, drenching the north end of the house.   I guess we needed a project...

Liz returns to Virginia today with our gratitude.  She has been an enormous support to her dear younger sister, and, with Ryan, helped cover some of the wee hours.  Liz applied her great organizational skills to coordinating food runs from our supportive friends, and she showed great patience, tenderness, good cheer and fortitude with Paige through some very trying moments.   

She joins Brooks who returned to Virginia on Wednesday to resume his studies.  Brooks gave us wonderful support while he was at home, and he now buoys our spirits with reports on his new classes, his terrific church and friends, and his ongoing charitable work.   He is making Paigey proud as a student, a walker for the animal shelter, a volunteer for Habitat and a friend to Kenyan refugee children.  Liz and Brooks are both inspiring.  They are loved beyond measure.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Today Paige took a turn for the better.  She rested peacefully last night in what seemed to be more natural sleep.  When her doctors arrived at seven, they brought a bit of food instead of the dreaded tube.  By midday, Paige was ready for her first pureed lunch.  This afternoon, she had a relaxed and lucid conversation with a friend.  This evening she smiled broadly for the first time and blew out her cheeks to make a funny face.

Once again your support has been tremendous.  The comments here continue to delight us all. An avalanche of cards arrived by post, along with many cards and greetings from Kent, including one from the boys hockey team and one from the boys and girls swim teams.

Ryan returns to Kent tonight.  He carries with him the heavy burden of our nominating him as the Kent ideal.  Ryan is calm and strong, witty and patient, giving and forgiving, scholar and athlete.  He has been by Paige's side day and night, rarely leaving the hospital.

Ryan has had a magical effect on Paige and has been very instrumental in her recovery.  He has communicated constantly with the Kent community through hundreds of calls and text messages.  He has endured stressful conditions and sleepless nights and days, all with good spirits.  He is a true gentleman.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Paige's nurse dredged up a bit of Jamaican slang from her youth and called Paige a ginnal, or trickster, when she managed with both arms restrained to scoot low in bed, pretend to scratch her face, and then pull her feeding tube - again.  

Unfortunately the report of her being able to start eating was premature.  She needs to be more alert to ensure that the food goes where it should, and Paige has yet to see any solid food.   The feeding tube must stay in for the time being.

We are thinking of her swim team as they battle Williston today.  Good luck.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Two physical therapists came to work on Paige this afternoon.  Paige soon had them out for a short shuffle, with one therapist on either side supporting her.  Tonight she is softly singing "Jessie's Girl" by Rick Springfield and "A Whole New World" from Aladdin.

A gentleman named Kent, whom we see frequently here in town, always greets us robustly with his salutation from the Psalms: "This is the day which the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it".  This was a wonderful day.  Thank you, Kent.
Newsflash:  Paige just passed her swallowing test and ate some applesauce.  She may now start eating pureed foods.  The feeding tube will stay in for the time being, and the transition will be gradual to guard against vomiting and aspiration, but this is welcome news.

Paige kept struggling last night to get out of bed.  Ryan asked her where she was going and Paige responded, "to my audition".  For what, he asked.  She replied, "American Idol".  When Liz was discussing with a nurse how to respond to Paige's movements, Paige whispered, "My sister knows what she is talking about", which amazed Liz.  A private ambition and a secret admiration, perhaps.

We hear from many of you of your gratitude for the exuberant, loving and moving comments posted here by Paige's many friends.  You are all lifting Paige up together.  When we wonder about some of the strange things that Paige is saying, we are gratified to read Mal's comment about Paige stopping in the road because she claimed she saw an armadillo.  We then are reminded that the abnormal is just the Paige normal.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Thursday found Paige still very grounded. She was wired to monitors, and her arms were still in restraints. But tonight she flicked her extended first two fingers rapidly back and forth and whispered, "Scissors...I want scissors". She is determined to escape.

Paige later asked about her condition (after conquering her restraints). Her mother assured her, "Trust me, you will be fine." She responded calmly, "Trusting you is not enough". Two well trained doctors later, she seemed more at ease. Shades of Ronald Reagan's "Trust, but verify".

Paige had her first physical therapy test and scored well responding to commands. Her swelling is going down. Feeding is the next issue. The swallowing reflex can apparently be damaged in traumatic brain injury, and it needs to be tested and retrained to ensure that her nourishment goes into the stomach and not the lungs. That testing process will start tomorrow. Paige will be restrained less and enjoy herself more when her food no longer comes through a hose in the nose.

Several of you have asked about sending her cards and letters. Please mail them to Paige at 5 Pierson Drive, Greenwich CT 06831, and we will make sure that she gets them. Your comments on the blog are a great alternative to cards because you write so well, we all enjoy them, and the comments are preserved for Paige to read and answer when her fingers are once again flying over her keyboard.

Others have asked about visiting. At this stage, Paige MUST stay calm to help her recovery. Visitors are strongly discouraged for now. This will be true at least through the weekend. We will of course post as soon as Paige is ready for company, which she loves. 

In the meantime, we pray for the rest that refreshes her soul and body, and we look forward to the day when the wind is once more at her back and the sun shines warmly on her face.

Thank you for all your wonderful support today, and throughout this week.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

On Wednesday Paige had a feeding tube put down her nose.  This narrow bit of white plastic provided her first nourishment in four days.  It did not get high marks from the girl who heads straight for Cindy the dessert chef, revels in the variety of boarding school food, and was a leading competitor in the school pie eating contest.

Paige had improved enough by evening to be moved from the intensive care unit to the special care unit.  She became increasingly restless as evening wore on into night, and she was fitted first with large white mittens, and then with arm restraints to keep her from removing her many wires and tubes.  Her doctor told us that her agitation was an instinctive flight response to waking in a frightening environment.  

At one point, a new nurse asked if we could do anything for her.  Paige responded, out of the blue, "Make me fly".   

We hope that Paigey rests well tonight and soars in her dreams.  We are thinking of her following John Gillespie Magee's High Flight:

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled  and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence.  Hov'ring there,
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air....

Up, up the long, delirious burning blue,
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew -
And, while with silent lifting mind I've trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand and touched the face of God.
Paige continues to improve.  Her fever is down this morning and her white blood cell count is better.  Yesterday her TV was on for the first time for a few minutes in the morning.  We were concerned that the inauguration might not proceed without the presence of the feisty founder of the Kent Democratic Club.  She could hear the inaugural speech, and when asked what was on the TV she whispered "Barack Obama".  

She has since uttered a few words, and she has reached out to touch those close to her, but she continues to be in considerable pain.  We welcome your prayers for her recovery.

Paige has received great support from her school.   Her headmaster, her dean and her chaplain visited on Sunday and gave her prayers, love and support.  Her friends have sent her an avalanche of cards that we hope she will soon enjoy.  A Chapel service at Kent will focus on Paige today. 

Paige's wonderful boyfriend has been at the hospital since early Sunday.  He gives Paige great comfort with his steady and affectionate presence.  The driver and the other passenger in the car visited her, and we pray for their relief from the pain of seeing Paige so injured.

We are trying to be near Paige around the clock.  Her brother and sister have been very helpful in covering the wee hours and giving her their unflagging love and support.  Friends have kept us nourished with a steady supply of food, water and love.  We are very grateful.

While we all worry and worry, we know that Paige, in her old self, would tell us "Don't worry, be happy".  The song is posted here as a reminder of how much we all long for the early return of that old self.  

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Welcome to Paige's blog.  Unfortunately, Paige is not yet writing here.  Her family will provide updates when there is news.  Later, Paige will be able to see your comments and will, we hope very soon, seize this and report on herself.  Until then, thank you for all your support, prayers, and love.

Paige was a passenger in a car that overturned early in the morning of Sunday January 18th. She suffered serious injuries to her head and spine, including two skull fractures and seven fractured vertebrae, bruised lungs, and a broken collarbone and cheekbone.  She was taken to the best trauma unit in the area, where she has been receiving considerate care.  

Paige has been sedated to allow her to recover from the injuries and not struggle against the various invasive tubes, including five that were down her throat.  Late on Monday her team decided that she had recovered enough to breathe on her own, and they removed the breathing tubes.

On Tuesday, she spoke a few words.  She is in a lot of pain and needs help managing her discomfort.  Her clavicle may require surgery, but she cannot be operated on unless her brain injuries improve substantially.  

We have been grateful for the outpouring of support from friends and family and her extraordinary Kent community.   We know that she is buoyed by all the love and prayers and cards and flowers.  Please keep her in your thoughts.